Monday, May 1, 2017

THIS IS FUNNY! IF YOU DO NOT LAUGH YOUR NO HUMAN!!

Subject: IDIOTS ABOUND!

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IDIOT SIGHTING 
I work with an individual who plugged her power
strip back into itself and for the sake of her life, couldn't understand why her
system would not turn on.  A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriff’s office, no
less.

IDIOT SIGHTING 
I handed the teller @ my bank a withdrawal slip for $400.00 I said "May I have large bills, please". 
She looked at me and said "I'm sorry sir, all the bills are the same size." When I got up off the floor I explained it to her. IDIOT SIGHTING

When my husband and I arrived at an automobile
dealership to pick up our car, we were told the
keys had been locked in it. We
went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly
to unlock the driver side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I
instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. 'Hey,'
I announced to the technician, 'it's open!' His reply: 'I know, I already got
that side. ' 
This was at the Ford dealership in Canton , MS

IDIOT

SIGHTING
We had to have the garage door repaired. 
The Sears repairman told us
that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the
opener.
I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one Sears made
at that time, a 1/2 horsepower.
He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a
1/4 horsepower.' I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4.
He said, 'NO, it's
not.' Four is larger than two.'
We haven't used Sears repair since.

IDIOT

SIGHTING
My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I
gave the clerk a $5 bill.
Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a
quarter.
She said, 'you gave me too much money.' I said, 'Yes I know, but this
way you can just give me a dollar bill back.
She sighed and went to get the
manager, who asked me to repeat my request.
I did so, and he handed me back the
quarter, and said 'We're sorry but we could not do that kind of thing.'
The clerk then proceeded to give me back $1 and 75 cents in change. 
Do not confuse
the clerks at McD's. 

IDIOT SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE

My daughter went to a
local Taco Bell and ordered a taco.
She asked the person behind the counter for
'minimal lettuce.' He said he was sorry, but they only had iceburg lettuce.

>From Kansas City 

IDIOT SIGHTING

I was at the airport, checking in at the
gate when an airport employee asked, 'Has anyone put anything in your baggage
without your knowledge?'
To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge,
how would I know?' He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we
ask.'  Happened in Birmingham , Ala. 


IDIOT SIGHTING

The stoplight on the
corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street.
I was crossing with an
intellectually challenged co-worker of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer
was for.  I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.

Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing driving?!'

She was a probation officer in Wichita , KS

IDIOT SIGHTING

At a good-bye
luncheon for an old and dear co-worker who was leaving the company due to
'downsizing,' our manager commented cheerfully, 'This is fun. We should do this
more often.' Not another word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with
that deer-in-the-headlights stare.This was a lunch at Texas
Instruments.

IDIOT SIGHTING 
I work with an individual who plugged her power
strip back into itself and for the sake of her life, couldn't understand why her
system would not turn on.  A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriff’s office, no
less.


now for the best IDIOT SIGHTING of all

How would you pronounce this
child's name?
"Le-a"
Leah?? NO
Lee - A?? NOPE 
Lay - a?? NO 
Lei?? Guess
Again.
This child attends a school in Kansas City, Mo.
Her mother is irate
because everyone is getting her name wrong.
It's pronounced "Ledasha".
When the Mother was asked about the pronunciation of the name, she said, "the dash
don't be silent."
SO, if you see something come across your desk like this
please remember to pronounce the dash.

The reason why
If dey axe you why, tell dem de dash don't be silent. STAY ALERT! They walk among us......and they VOTE (Probably for Obama). and have babies. For all of us who are seniors... baby diapers have brand names suc When babies poop in their pants
as Pampers, Luvs and Huggies, while those
undergarments for old people are called Depends:, people are
still gonna Pamper them, Luv'em and Hug'em.
When old people poop in their pants, it Depends
on who's in the will!


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